Changing a bad habit can be hard. We’re all probably pretty familiar with this truth.
We often try and just stop doing that thing. Cold turkey. We figure we’ll just white knuckle through it and come out on the other side minus that habit.
But here’s the deal: Our habits are engrained in us—they are a part of us, and they’re just things we do, often without even thinking. And if there’s a habit we’d like to eliminate, while we might be able to stop doing that habit for a few days, eventually, it just doesn’t work anymore. And we’re back to doing it again.
Why? Why can’t we just stop doing something and be successful?
Any time we want to change a habit and be successful long-term, we need to replace that habit with something else, with a new habit. And hopefully, we replace that bad habit with something that is related to a goal AND is a positive habit. That’s a two-for-one win all around.
Why do we need to replace a bad habit with something else?
When you think about it, our habits—whether good or bad—give us some sort of benefit. There’s a reason we keep doing them, after all.
Think about some of your habits (both good and not so good): What benefit do you get from them?
So, when we stop one habit, we need to replace the benefits we’re not going to get anymore from that habit. We need to create a new habit so we can still get the benefit of habit keeping.
How do you create a new habit?
#1. Take on only one new habit at a time. Why? Here are some powerful stats:
- Take on one new habit = 80% chance of success for a year or more
- Take on two new habits = 35% chance of success
- Take on three new habits = 5% chance of success
And while you might think, “Replacing only one habit at a time will take me forever to accomplish anything!” Remember: When you do one new habit, it will flow into other areas of your life. For example, when you eat healthy, you’ll feel better, you’ll have more energy, you might work out more, you might accomplish more, and you’ll be healthier overall, so this one habit change affects other areas of your life in positive ways!
And if you just cannot work on only one habit at a time, if you just feel like you must do more, try to work on habits in different areas of your life: Physical, emotional, spiritual, intellectual, relational, and so forth.
#2. Give yourself lots of grace and patience. You will mess up, so every time you do, learn from that mess up and use that new-found knowledge to do better next time. After all, we’re going for long-term success here, not short-term accolades. Experts say it takes about 66 days to create a new habit, so get in the new-habit-keeping mode for the long haul and don’t set yourself up for failure by giving yourself too short of a timetable for creating that new habit.
#3. Make sure that new habit will give you positive rewards. Otherwise, you’re exchanging one bad habit for another one.
And once you’ve got that new habit rock solid, stack on another one. And be sure and use what you learned from creating habit #1 to be even more successful with habit #2!
What’s a habit you’d like to eliminate from your life?
What new habit will you put in place to replace that old one?
Want to learn more about habits? Check out these posts:
Don’t Set New Year’s Resolutions. Create New Year’s Habits.
Protect the Asset
#SeptemberJanuary Challenge. Again
Promises & Integrity
Step #1 to Making Changes and Achieving Goals: Keep Commitments to Yourself
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